Our little Chinese Girls

This was a good week. Adoption is expensive, and we knew it would be going in. Every little thing costs a lot of money, and there are lots and lots of little things. They seem spread out, and not so hard to swallow sometimes. The agency fees are awesomely spread out, so there is time to save in between each one. On Thursday, I sent off my immigration approval to Washington DC. It cost me $64 to send it, and $115 to get it authenticated! Holy cow, 1 document!! That was a little rough. Then I received an email that China has raised their fee which will cost me $675 if my dossier isn't received there by March 1. It's going to be sooooooooo close, but well worth a lot of prayers on our end. So this day that I thought would cost me around $50, cost me close to $900!! Whoa! Oh well, it's the price that must be paid, and we do it happily.

I had the most amazing experience on Thursday morning. It started like any other morning. I woke up very early, did my morning routine, woke my family, and got them going on theirs. I remembered in the course of the morning that I needed cream for a preschool project, and it had to be done that day. So, slightly rushed and annoyed that I hadn't purchased the cream the day before while I was at the store, I headed off. I have a new little chant that runs through my head a zillion times a day, and every quiet moment that I get, and thus I began saying it over and over in my mind as I drove to the grocery store. About half way there, i thought my heart would fly away! This feeling came over me that I have felt before, but not frequently and not so intensely. It was a feeling of pure peace and joy. It was lovely and unexpected. It was from God telling me that He is aware of me and our situation, and He is in control of it. It was such a beautiful experience, it will carry me through a lot of difficult times to come.

I feel my Chinese girls a lot. I feel them frequently. It is similar to the mild stress that I feel when my present girls are away from me, or when I am away from them. I really like when we're all together, safe and happy at home, and when we're not, there is a little bit of anxiety, and wonder and hope that everyone is well, and that we'll be together soon. It's not huge, but it's there in my head. I feel that for my Chinese girls all the time. Sometimes I feel it very strongly and it's hard. I don't know where they are, or if they're ok, or if they need to be held or fed and are instead crying in their bed. I feel that Heavenly Father lets me feel some of their anxiety and need at times. It propels me, and binds me to them even though I don't know who they are. We pray for them and their well-being, and peace to know that we are coming. We pray for their health and strength, and happiness. We pray for our paperwork to go quickly and smoothly. And we pray that we will be together at home, safe and happy, very soon. I feel that on Thursday morning, I got to feel some of their joy. Maybe their paperwork got started in China so that they'll be "adoptable" soon. Maybe they feel us too! I don't know, and I probably never will. This has been the coolest journey ever. It has been hard, and frustratingly slow, but over all, so far, it's been really cool.